The following post is an excerpt from White Lies: Race & Uncertainty in the Twilight of American Religion (Routledge, 2015).


Whiteness, the racialized expression of a fundamental inability to accept limitation and uncertainty, has died.

Though the actual time and place of birth of Mr. Whiteness is unknown, it has been said that his “social” birth took place in the Southern part of the United States in the decades following the Civil War and word of his birth soon spread across the country. Conceived during the nuptials of Enslavement and Colonialism, Mr. Whiteness would go on to lead a storied life only dreamt of by his parents.

He was autodidact by education, but celebrated his influence on all areas of intellectual inquiry, including and especially the ivory towers of academia. He worked in a variety of fields including education, politics, engineering, law and law enforcement, business, religion, art and entertainment, and sports. He had a flare for individualism and worked to ensure that individuality served as a dominant motif for groups throughout the United States.

Throughout his life, he fought tooth and nail against death and dying, treating death as a form of taxation without representation. He contributed substantially to scientific and technological developments to overcome death, but in the end, Mr. Whiteness found his efforts limited. As adept with the pen as much as the rifle, Mr. Whiteness exerted an impact in all spaces he dared to travel, and he traveled globally and extensively. He fought the scourge of communism and collectivist thinking for decades through secrecy, ever-increased funding for military expenditures, and attempted extermination of collective thinking in Southeast Asia, the Middle East, Central and South America, and many parts of Africa.

He was known for extending opportunities to his most cherished friends and family. For his loved ones, he would help to ensure laws and economic regulations provided them with advantage and relative safety. Those dealing with this loss remember his magnanimity. He leaves behind a host of colleagues, family, and friends, most notably, he forged a long-standing love affair with his ideal woman, named Victoria, whose thinness, frivolity, and general silence he revered for its manageability. His most cherished associates include patriarchy, heteronormativity, elitism, greed, and theism.

Despite such an illustrious career, he sought to live in relative obscurity and out of the spotlight. Only in death, and the pain felt by this loss, is his full impact on those around him being realized.

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